I think it’s really important to differentiate between conventional, commercial dairy (which is also high-temp pasteurized and homogenized) and raw dairy from grassfed animals. So often dairy is used as a blanket term to address both, often unfairly IMO. While some people will still have sensitivities to dairy regardless, for many people, the difference between the two is black and white. Nutritionally as well. To my knowledge, the vast majority of, if not all, studies done on the effects of milk in the diet are conducted using the former. The latter is a fantastic source of many important nutrients – if it is well-tolerated. The Weston A. Price Foundation has some great information on the benefits of raw milk.
Another important thing to note is that just because cow dairy is inflammatory for someone does not mean that dairy from other species will have the same result. For myself, I’ve never been able to tolerate cow dairy, but I grew up on our own homegrown raw goat dairy and did very well on it. Sheep, camel, yak, etc. are all potential alternates to the typical cow dairy that we so often think of first.
For myself, eliminating peppers (nightshade and peppercorns) from my diet made the biggest difference in my fibro pain!